I don’t know about you guys but I’ve been in such a funk since the quarantine started. And now I’m finally starting to feel like my old self again. I also think it’s because I started blogging again. It feels good to be back. I don’t feel like I’m dreading each day and waiting for this quarantine to be over anymore. No one knows how long this will last and why not just make the best of it?
I have been working on improving myself. I’ve been cleaning and organizing my things. And that has relieved much of my stress that I have been having. I’ve also been working a lot. Work keeps my mind off of overthinking. And that’s important to me.
I want to talk about animal crossing too. I’ve been playing a lot of it. And I’m in the process of trying to upgrade my stuff. Here are some of my photos of my favorite moments so far. I highly recommend playing animal crossing pocketcamp first before you commit to buying the new animal crossing game. I am not going to let myself buy the game unless I know that I will commit to playing it. I don’t want to spend a month of playing and then never play it again.
I think there’s something wrong with my WordPress page because it doesn’t show me my notifications for my likes or comments. I’m not sure how to fix it, but I can still see my stats perfectly fine on another page.
I didn’t have such a good day today. It started out fine when I was teaching my first four lessons and things went downhill around the afternoon. I wasn’t expecting these students who are on a break from lessons due to the quarantine to continue lessons right now, but I only wanted to show them that there’s a game for the piano that they could play in the meantime. It costs them nothing to download and use it, but they said that they don’t want to. They said that they have too much on their plate right now. I don’t know if it’s because my hormones are all over the place, but them acting like that really peeved me. They don’t have to pay for anything! I’m not asking them for anything. And I don’t get anything from it. They still didn’t want it. Fine. I don’t expect for them to come back because I won’t keep their spot open. I know it’s harsh, but I have things to do and I know I’ve been way too nice. I’m done with it.
This quarantine has made me super irritated in some ways and happy in other ways. I’ve been able to travel often. I like getting away from everyone. And I constantly need to have my space. It has been refreshing for me. I’ve also been spending a lot of alone time. I feel like the mantra of my life is to be by myself, but it’s my favorite thing to do. Not much has been new. I hope blogging my feelings will help me with feeling better.
I apologize so much for not being on here and I know there’s a lot to explain. Ever since the quarantine started, I’ve had zero inspiration to be productive and the only thing I’ve been doing is trying to keep my piano studio together. I know there is no excuse for such a long hiatus, but that is honestly what I’ve been going through. I hope you all are okay during this time and are staying safe. I hope to post more content on here and look out for more blog posts!
I think I’ve leveled up this year. I feel more strong than I ever did before. And I feel very secure in what my future is going to look like. I know that I will be okay no matter what. I have worked so hard the last couple of days and I’m so proud that I haven’t given up. I think most people would have called it quits if they had to work so hard for something. I know that I have a good future and I’m heading right for it.
As I’m getting older, I’ve also learned that no one can tell me what to do anymore. It doesn’t really matter what my parents want me to do. I have made all the decisions for myself and I’m proud of that. I know that my life is mine now. And I used to be so irritated when I was told what to do all of the time. It’s good to know that I don’t have to deal with my parents hovering over everything I do anymore. My life is free and not exhausting.
I’m also running out of ideas of what to write about. I’ve been fairly active on my blog for the past couple of months. I love blogging, but I need new ideas. Let me know what are some good ideas to write about!
Today, I got into my second car accident. Yes, I wasn’t paying attention when I was driving. I looked down for a second and I didn’t have enough time to break, so I ended up rear ending another car. I was traumatized. You never know what is going to happen after the car accident. Am I going to survive this? Is this going to cause me a lot of injuries? Is the other driver okay? I saw my car do things that I didn’t know it could do and I felt terrible about it. The car I hit ended up being completely fine. There wasn’t even a dent in the other car, so the other driver ended up letting me go. He wasn’t upset or anything. I was so grateful. I then pulled into another community to absorb all of the shock of what just happened. I turned off the engine and I just sat in my car trying to let the shock wear off.
Since I’m a huge perfectionist, I was so upset with myself for doing this again. I wanted to hate myself, but I ultimately knew that it was only an accident. I didn’t do this on purpose and people make mistakes. I would never had expected this to happen today, but I can’t give myself a really hard time. I have to understand that this is my fault and I need to take responsibility for it, but I do not have to continue to beat myself up for it. What’s done is done. And I need to start fixing it. I sat there for almost forty minutes before my mind was clear again. I have to say though that my neck hurts and my head is still numb from the accident. I’m going to call a chiropractor tomorrow and try to help myself to start healing. And I already dropped my car off to an auto shop to start appraising the damages. I was so scared during the accident because my knees hit the car. I thought I lost both of my legs. And I honestly think that I’m still suffering ptsd from what happened.
I’ve learned that I need to lessen my driving because I drive a lot for my job. And I am at more of a risk of getting into a car accident than most people are because I’m always driving. I thought about my blog and how I need to start relying on it more. I’m lucky to have a supportive family and partner, but I need to be more independent. I’m going to take some time off today and try to relax my head from pounding. I’ll talk to everyone tomorrow. Thank you for reading.
I’ve been looking at rotten tomatoes and I noticed that anybody can say that they are a movie critic. Literally anyone can write a review and say that they are a critic! I don’t see the difference between a movie critic and the audience. Anyways, I decided that since I love movies so much, I am going to be a movie reviewer. And I’ve watched a lot of movies so far. I am not going to be harsh like the reviews I see on rotten tomatoes. The reviews made by critics are ridiculous. They only say negative things. For example, the reviews they wrote about Jumanji were terrible. They called it stupid. I don’t think the movie was stupid. And they don’t even say why it’s stupid!
Anyways, I just finished watching Knives Out and it is the best movie I’ve seen in awhile. The movie was well-written with many plot twists. And I thoroughly enjoyed watching it in the theaters. The movie itself is pretty long, but it keeps you engaged all throughout the movie. You’re always wondering who killed the grandfather and why. I don’t want to give out any spoilers, but I highly recommend watching it in the movie theaters while it’s still out. I don’t think watching it at home will do it justice.
I noticed many similarities that my family has to the family in the movie. My family has secrets and hidden agendas at times. I would say that the movie accurately represents the dynamics of a disjointed family. Not everyone is happy being in a family at times. And you don’t always get along with your family. It was very enjoyable to see all of the characters interact with one another and the family aspect of the movie was the best part for me.
I also don’t usually have pictures with my blog posts, but I found that this picture is pretty nice. Maybe I will have more pictures on my posts in the future!
I’ve had a rough start to this year. I didn’t get the lsat score I wanted and I feel like my mental status tanked completely. I was also sick multiple times and it’s only February. I don’t know if this is foreshadowing how the rest of my year will be. I know I shouldn’t think of it this way, but I can’t help it. I want a good year for myself. And I want to achieve my goals. Maybe life is not always about achieving goals, but to constantly want to improve. The end is not better than the journey. I’ve been working so hard to make a better life for myself. And I feel like my efforts are lost. I really hope that things get better soon.
I think it’s very impressive if someone can write well and be able to articulate their thoughts onto paper. In my case, I write on a digital platform. My blog is my outlet and it gives me the ability to share all of my thoughts. I’ve been writing for awhile now. And none of this is new to me. You can go back to my old blogs and read everything I’ve ever written. I’m actually glad that I have a large capsule full of my own writing. I am also heavily attracted to those who write their feelings down. I love long paragraphs of text messages. And I crave these long messages. I want to know more about someone’s thoughts. I ultimately want to know what they’re thinking and the best way is to have it all written down. I can’t describe it very well, but I don’t think writing will ever go out of style. I want to write more and hopefully one day, I’ll be able to write a novel. It won’t be great, but it will be mine. And I hope to achieve these goals someday.
I tell myself this every day: don’t give up. I know that I will never get anything if I choose to give up early. Life is about continuing to work hard day after day. You can put in a day’s worth of work and it won’t matter. You have to continue working for months and maybe years to get what you want. At first, I didn’t know if I had the perseverance to keep going. I felt like giving up. And I wanted to try doing something else. Well… I’m not going to give up. I’m going to continue pushing no matter what. I know I will achieve my goals and I cannot let myself get in the way. I will do this.
If you needed to hear this too, take a moment to appreciate all of the work you have done so far. Don’t discredit yourself. You are worth it. Nothing worth having is going to be easy.